www.evil.com

we get it... daily

 

 

Finally, more quotes to make you feel superior!

Works for us.

This stuff keeps getting longer, kind of like a... well you know.

Le monde ne tourne plus rond, la planète et les gens qui y vivent deviennent fou, ou inconscient ce qui est pire ! 

  yeah, it's a crazy world, right?

The flavor of the weak is always changing, but who is changing the flavor of the weak? -BriaGuya 

  uh dude, it's week

The onion? I ate an onion once. it was gooood, and it spoke to me like no other onion has spoken to me before--Wait, no, that was the bagel. much love (actually, let's just keep it at 'like) *ahem* Much like, Sahndkas 

  pssst, it was an onion bagel

do you live in the baseball field in that picture? I Believe you do. 

  we got to third base on that field, man that's living...

hey, if thats you on the static page,t hen you're hot. heh. i also thought that the dead 'belch' [not the alive one, he was ugly] from the movie it was hot...yum. 

  yup, we're the ones in the escher print

I don't exactly understand why you must be so rude to the people who say stupid stuff on  this site. It's not like they're trying or anything. Anyways.... I think this site needs to be bigger. I read the whole thing in 15 minutes. I am a very negative person. Fear my fisticus, for with it I shall rule all. I need a soda, But if I drink another one, I might get skin Cancer. Blast and bebother this cherubim-like delinma.-- Jerry Artellimonator  

  whatever

I miss clicking on the happy daisy Web page. Did you know educated reporters even like this Web site? -- Steven in Seattle 

  there are educated reporters in Seattle? that's news

 - I only come here once every week or so, but this places give me a feeling of "give me a kick in the ass it feels good" feeling. thanks for putting it up. it makes people like me feel great. haha.- fuck me im famous- Tony Daniels- Press Submit - 

  bend over, we'll make you feel good again

Im not "crazy", fuggin people take normal to an extreme! Richard Hutchins 

  if you were really crazy, you'd go by Rickie

Sorry I clicked on the wrong site ... but while im here has anyone seen my boot?  - Teddy Ruxpin (yeah the talking teddy bear)

  your site got canceled. your batteries went into the vibrator. no, we haven't seen your boot

Yo, son!  this is wanksta the jesta!!  i think this site is kind of cool, too bad i cant figure out what the purpose of it is.  Why would you waste money on such a valueable domain name only to have a site with nothing on it?  -Brendon Jenkinson 

  reading that was like walking backwards in at

Hi im at skool and it sucks! 

  maybe if you spelled it school it would suck less?

no one ever made to shout any more why?      louis knight 

  maybe cause they didn't after wasn't?

I am watching you ( and i no you are watching me watching you beware)       you dont know my name..... 

  and that's the way we like it

i am Sharna, aka The Axis of Evil, u see.... all the evil revolves around me! mwuah ha ha ha... oh i mean... he he he heh 

  yeah, get that right, it's important

Thank you for building this site, it is everything an evil entity ever dreamed of, the hidden links are a good idea, gives me something to search for when I'm too tired to plan assassinations- Angel of Death

  why do we keep running into these guys with the heavy metal names.  you just know they're some pimply kid in Encino

Last night was the full moon.  My broomstick is getting good mileage this week.  -Imalegna Jones 

  we do not want to know what you do with the stick!

 What do you guys think about confession?  Because I have some stuff to confess.  Like, umm I like boyz and I'm a girl.  Is that wrong?  My therapist says it's wrong, he says I should like girls and only girls.  Normal sex is bad, that's what he says.  Mike Demon 

  drink more, talk less

You cannot leave without passing through the door. - Steven Hartig 

  hah! you forgot the window!

This site needs improving i could do a better evil sight go on my both sites to see 1) http://www.geocities.com/darkmagic_sorceror/home.html 2) http://www.flashbuilder.net/users/jamesrulez/   Those are my sites by james springall yes there long adresss but worth it im gonna add evil.com to ma site. 

  if your site is on geocities dude you should not be bragging

hello, my name is trizkit and iam from crappy ass springfield,illinois any girls wanna chat e-mail me at trikstarr666@yahoo.com 

  is crappy ass anywhere near lame ass?

theres no monkeys here, no sure not here but at monkeyv ville, where the fuck is monkey ville, please dear god tell me where!!! 

  over there.  no, there.  no... up there.  damn monkeys

my mommy thought i was scary so she made this weird doctor ask me questions in the little nicky voice and then she ran out money and that bitch in mirror land still wont leave me ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hehehehe 

  was this all in one day, or over a couple of weeks?

Okay Jules Verne, you've run out of time zones, it is now past noon on the twentieth, and the most evil page on the web (I love it) still reads the eighteenth.  Come on, get to work. signed Chris Allen 

  we lie, we're lazy, and we aren't charging you for this. live with it.

 Life never get any better or worse it just stays the same but more so...  - sloogigan 

  until... no, you're right

the time has come the walrus said to think of many things of shoes and ships, of celin wax and cabbages and kings and why the sea is boiling hot and weather pigs have wings?- (from ancie in wonder land) mat slatter  

  so much for culture.  is Lewis Carrol going to sue us?

It's amazing how fast you can make someone run if you point a car at them. Catie Rex 

  they go faster once they're on the hood

hi my tech teacher is a lesbian 

  not any good unless she has a hot assistant and lab coats from victoria's secret

Arggg! Thou hast enraged me, mortals! Thy lack of response to my less-than-awesome feedback on your site has made me less angry than I was that one time that I flush my brother down the river in a bottomless boat. Thou must be afrighted by my insanity that surpasses the limits of my own imagination. Cripes. I have lost my train of thought. Can I get back to you? 

  afrighted?

Errr... Right then. I am the guy who was rambling about how angry I was with you. So, anyways. I just figured I should clarify something. I am Jerry Artellimonator. Fear me. 

  Artelimonator? sounds like some kind of juicer

hey does that lady in the fuck me im famous shirt have corn tits or nice roundish ones? after all thats ur mom right? 

  we always close our eyes

I woke up today, Skiddle Dee Dee, I'll go to sleep tonight Skiddle Dee Doo. Yashua Ohuffe 

  lather, rinse, repeat

Je suis le singe diabolique avec les tartes. ..bow en bas me mortels chétifs. ..you ne saura rien mais la pomme! -David Bergstraesser 

  yeah, french monkeys. that's exactly what this site needs

Your site is crazy, yet scary in a odd sort of war. Your evil and disturbing images will wreak havock in my brain forever cameron. 

  did you know cameron means "hooked nose?"

Was looking for stuff on Freud's theories of psychoanalysis on a search engine and it suggested that your site may be useful.  Definitely not going to help my dissertation but more interesting to read!  Ta. Love me xxx 

  our site may indeed be useful. only time will tell

By the way, it's only British men that are wimps, which is why us English girls like you lot so much!  You might not be as clever, but you're more fun to laugh at!  (My boyfriend is from New York). Me xxxx 

  not as clever as British men? can a British man do this?  how about this?  yeah, we though you'd like that you Piccadilly trollop

 But if you can come up with something genuinely clever, please go right ahead. There, was that good enough?

  nope

Something that's been bothering me, I read about them in books, what the hell is a twinkie? 

  a twinkie in a book sounds messy

BoOoooOO, DowN wiTh Evil Up WitH GooD. 

  so good basically has trouble with the shift key eh?

You know.... I'v typed sooooo much stuff here. I typed something and signed it cameron, and attemempted to type the thing at the end,(took me a long time, but I got it)and then I said: "how about Good.com?" Just so you know, you can call me Zork. Mabey all be like your daily visoiter? I'll be back, bye!  

  we already have a daily visoiter, but if they quit can you leave a resume?

Hello Evil.com. I enjoy this site immensely. Please continue to do whatever it is you claim to do, lest I drown a squirel in week old butter. In conclusion, I hereby state that I shall not by any means destroy the Universe, nor the world so long as this site remains on the internet and relatively awesome. Thusly I say: "Change or destroy this site, and I will do something diabolical.... or maybe just slightly aggravating. Er... You have been warned... kinda... Ummm... DAMNIT! I am not a very threatening person am I? I would probably be more threatening if I was a few inches taller and had black hair. Maybe a big stick to hit stuff with too.... So yeah, beware." -- J.L.S. A.K.A. Javelin Lance Spears. 

  ok, we'll destroy the site. but we're gonna go really really slow

In France, you dance and prance, you take a chance, while smelling plants, and eating pants, you seek a place deep within your rants.  In other words:  France is cursed with a nefarious spell that morphs its inhabitants into insane, homosexual, pant-eating goats who smell the weed smoked by the Germans.  I guess that's not too out of the ordinary... - - Jorn

  and yet, they're so good with hygiene.  oh, wait, that's not the french, that's spider monkeys.  keep getting them confused

Life: no one gets out alive. - Jared Ulmer

  we did!

my cat tells me secrets the world just can't understand - SLUGWRENCH

  listen.  meow. sound familiar?

Dubble secret?! Yeah right, for the love of god, don't click this my ass!

  Dubble?  you trying the Jersey accent on for fit or are you stuck with it?

Do people attually have sex just becouse they think it makes them look more Evil? - matthew( a different one from england) ( now i bet that is scary... a guy from england on this site.. oh well sh!t happens..) 

  what is with the english? they're so needy

evil is nothing without SAT*N he is everything evil....fuck you al 

  al, did you hear that? are you worried?

we are secretly enticed by the aromas of gasoline, hospitals and the occasional crotch. we rarely admit it. let's get in touch with our olfactory oddities. - par nell

  was that you?

The demon-possessed, FBI trained attack ghosts pilfer your house and eat all your socks, leading you to believe there is something seriously wrong with your washing machine.  -Samara Azucena

  its having trouble with the softener dispenser we just thought it was clogged

This site is so funny i could cum in my pants and puke all at once.. oh man i need a girlfriend.  want to know what animal is really under rated?  The Star Fish.  i wish i could puke up my guts to absorb the nutrients from food like bat guano.   Greg the Future Star Fish.  ::break dances:: 

  we wish you could puke up your guts too

My boyfriend got really ugly glasses & now I'm not attracted to him.  In fact, I'm sick of his damn stupidity.  What should I do? -Too Lazy to Write Dear Abby 

  abby is dead, but she'd still try to convince you that it's all your fault

I'm the Zoe Andrews of the United States, and proud of it!  -Jessica Mayhew 

  for those of you not reading in order, well, go back and read in order

If it weren't for evil, I wouldn't have a clue about the real world. - Lindsey Schuyler 

  clues we got, answers... can't help

Today is Tomorrows Yesterday and Today is Yesterdays Tomorrow ~-_Scizofetus_-~{kurt gold} 

  next tuesday is busy but we can do wednesday

yay, yay, Inme Rulez (Inme is a band, that if you don't live in britain or are 98% of the population you will not of heard of), Yay Inme, I actually don't like inme, just Dave!? By the way.... HI!

  if you have to explain it, it's not worth being proud about

So, I've been to www.good.com and I've got to say I like evil a hell of a lot better.  Remember kids, just because a company is named "good", that doesn't necessarily mean it is. 

  we give you Best Foods, maker of mayonnaise

I must protest--iambic pentameter does exist.  It is alternating long and short sylables OR alternating stressed sylables.  R. Edwin Ewing

 

nope, sorry, you're wrong dick 

I love this fucking site it is the bomb baby. Oh and just one thing can I be your new sweetie and if I can baby I'll ROCK YOUR WORLD!!!!!-(nicknameKitti) Meow

  our world is rocking fine.  we're looking for someone who'll stay still and won't ask questions

the lie is the only truth in our life- Islam Washia

  ladies and gentlemen, George W. Bush

 BEING BAD DONT MAK YOU  EVIL AND BEING EVIL DONT NESSIARELY MAKE YOU BAD - DAVE FORD (MOST HATED)

  and apparently, most hated for spelling

 This site is the brothel for all the disenchanted people of the world wide web.  I salute you - James UK 

  you may tip if you feel you've been well serviced

I don't see how a website that uses a bumblebee color scheme can be so funny. You Rock - BriaGuya  12.245.253.60

  it's blood and pus, oops! the secret is out...

There are too many insane people in the world, what happened to all the normal people?- P.S last night was great, you should use the penis pump more often-Angie

  and you didn't think it could make julianne fries...

Hey look... >> People can actually learn how to read! Maybe they all just have typos... Charles is the name of the Typo Demon... Or maybe they just discovered that the meaning of the keyboard is the press the buttons on it and come out with a few words. But, onto reality... Evil.com is about the only thing out there that has the "intelligence" to cure "boredom" created by impulses of the mind... - Karen Jackson

  did everyone knotice how kareful karen was about her spellin?

hi this is a strange and interesting site.  does tht mean tht ur live is completely hopless if u like this site,  maybe.  there is a point in what im writing.  u just have to find it.  keep lookin.  and if u click on everything in this site, u usually end up where u were. sorta like the chineese proverb, if u dont change ur direction, ull probly end up where ur headed.  but what if where ur headed is not what u want or need to be.  find the missing link. untill then u r  the weakest link. 

  u means you!  hey, we finally get it!

 I communicate with my nostrils.       -donny 

  stop yelling

Auto-fellatio is just one more reason to want to be a dog.  -Imalegna Jones

  we need one more and we're there

I have a time machine in my bedroom closet, put on this leather mask and i will show it to you........     David Silverstone

  oh, not again!

This site is an AOL time warner nightmare. No capitalism here!! -Nick Jones

  AOL is Time Warner's nightmare

 Yall full what the fuck were you thinking you don't know much if i were you i wil stop of what you are diong

  reverend jones, when did you get a computer?

I noticed a question asking what Jesus would drive. Now, I completely agree that he must be a jeep driving man, but what's with the diss on grand cherokees? I mean, it's obvious they are the best choice..  -jackie bellrose

  'cuz they suck.  next question?

Do you think evil will overthrow good in the longrun? Charlie Burnette

  we did in 1974, 1987 and again in 1995.  but we like the whole catch and release thing

Did you know that if you stacked together all the Oreo cookies ever made that they would be taller than 13.3 MILLION sears towers? (no bullshit!) Joel Jenkins   thesaintoftruth@yahoo.com

  nope, you bastards keep eating the cookies

I can fit 82 yellow chick peeps and 92 grapes in my mouth. -nikki dillon-

  date training secrets from New Jersey

You guys are awesome. If I were a critic I would give you guys 2 thumbs up! And to all those people who hate this site. YOUR ALL ASSHOLES AND SHOULD DIE A SLOW AND PAINFUL DEATH. I'm done 

  why are we somewhat afraid of the whole thumbs up concept?

I was wondering what would happen if we got Jesus's DNA, then isolated Mary's DNA; would we then have God's DNA? I don't really believe in religion, so that's why I was wondering - RonniE

  and then the movie Nazareth Park?

never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups-Matt Guy

  they don't even have to be in large groups

your that guy (or girl) in school that was a true smartass. you know the one that had everyone laughing at there comments but no one really wanted to hang around with for fear of those comments turning on them... arn't ya?  -J.C.

  nah, we're the ones that plotted the bloodless overthrow of the administration of the school...

Looks like evil.com is in southern California -----D.Silverstone

  we're everywhere

Evil.com is better than taking a camera to school and making a reality-TV-show/blackmail-tape! well... minus the money involved... Darkcristal13 e-mail: Darksword13@www.com 

  depends on who you blackmail.  we suggest cheer leaders

Man, I came 2 this address 4 blood and violence and stuff and all I get is words, Words 2 many WORDS! Mr H

  and it's only getting worse

-- .- -.-- ..--- --..-- ..--- ----- ----- ...-- --..--  ..  ..- -.. . .-. ... - .- -. -..  --- .--. . .-. .- - .. --- -.  ... - . .- .-.. .. -. --.  -.-. .- -. -.. -.--  ..-. .-. --- --  - .... .  -... .- -... -.--  .. ...  .-  --. --- <. - .... --- ...>  

  ... .-- .. - -.-. .... .. -. --.     - ---     ... - . .- .-.. .. -. --.     -- --- -. . -.-- 

.. /  .- -- /  .- -. /  .- --. . -. -   tyler theofilos

  .-- .... .- -     .. ...     -.-- --- ..- .-.     -. ..- -- -... . .-. 

i would enjoy an El Slusho. in case u don't know what an el slusho is, it's from a chinese bodega. y'no what i'm saying or am i to consetrated to crap? oh i ran over the taco bell bunny and the energizer dog. dairy king burger queen. these thing get expinentially more messed up each time right? well fook it all  i have to crap. ok that was sexy.

  damn, now we're hungry

if all the world gave the naked man a string, he would have a shirt.  Yet he would still have no pants.   -Matt Gaddis 

  so this shirt would be long, right?

I am in Germany.  Germany still has professional shepherds.  One of them, complete with hat, is tending his flock in the park near my current home.  We discuss politics.  He believes that George Bush is suffering from insanity.  Nothing really clever, just presenting the views of German shepherds.  -Imalegna Jones

  what about the views of the lying sheep!

I am thinking of a name for my child. I have narowed it down to 3 names 1. Richard Harder. 2. Cravin Morehead. 3. Jack Mehof. Whitch one should i choose?

  How about all three?

 curious- if eminem goes to war will he return with twice the popularity... like elvis.  i'm still convinced in your die-hard following of piers anthony.  and did you like the commander-in-chief's pacific poolside big boat publicity stunt, rivaled only to madonna's comeback and the king of pop's primetime television flop. just curious. jeff mills.

  or maybe...he'll just die.  everyone wins!

What's your Mom's phone #? She's Hot!! - Mike Long

  212-343-5... hey, wait a minute, you almost got us with that one...

Hey You Guys say you hate us english, yet man, technicaly your all from  England (or Europe unless your "native american" or Black) and whats worse some od you are probably origionaly French EEEWwwww :P Johnnie Kay

  we don't hate the English... not as much as the French that is... and we hated the French before it was patriotic

how can anyone put the words "microsoft" and "works" into the same sentance? 

  you just did

ACHTUNG! Alles touristen und non-technischen peepers! Das machine control is nicht fur gerfinger-poken und mittengrabben. Oderwise is easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowen fuse, und poppencorken mit spitzensparken. Der machine is diggen by experten only. Is nicht fur geverken by das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseenen keepen das cotten picken hands in das pockets, so relaxen und watchen das blinkenlights.

  hah, very nice.  grandpa told us that one when we were four

Some of us think you are Gods. Then again, some of us are ourselves Gods. Thank you for your time.   (John Brisby)

  it is our time, us being gods and all, we loan you the time

HEY...how DARE you not recognize Michael Palin's 60TH BIRTHDAY!?!?!? jeez, and after all he contributed to us, from Monty Python for all those long, hard years...well anyway remember it next year. PLEASE. ~grace~  68.119.68.251

  we were busy that day

how come you never update the shouts? -- r0y 

  well, we're pretty busy, what with all the being gods and junk

i disgust this stupid website wat an ugly font you are using please make a nice website with a nice layout our even try to learn making a website but i most say this isn't a website It sucks 

  did you wipe up when you were done?

Have you ever thought about it, rectangles are taking over the world, think about it, flags are rectangles, city blocks, everthing they're going to control us all, that's why i encourage all of you to destroy all rectangles in sight, thank you your help is much appericated, someday there will be an oversized moment that no one looks at with your name misspelled on it. 

  close, but it's the ovals

"the greatest foe lies within the self" so um... how protects us from ourselfs!??? - Xelloss Metallium

  ourselfs want to be left alone

i dont know if i can come up with anything genuinely clever but i can however just ramble on about nothing in particular i am very good  at that cause i have a lot of practice in that case of course if i were to come up with anything genuinely clever and do it just to get posted then you would see right through my bull shit and not post me. so my problem here is that i must find some way to get posted and not be found out all the same which is really hard. (*sniff* im so confused)  you do see why i am rambling now dont you -stefny AKA chibi zoku(little devil) 

  ok, times up.  same time next week

most of the drooling on this site is so much like rap music it's freaky, you should sell it to some untalented musicians.... wait... maybe they have already seen this site and are ripping off comments from you dedicated evildoers! better do something quick! god knows they can't think of there own gibberish! - Dante Zelas  1

  raul, call the lawyers.  we're suing the rappers

hey i dont know what this is it was an accident that i got here i need help now i cant leave i think im trapped._brian walton

  it was definitely an accident

It really bugs me to see all those idiots wasting their lives trying to find the meaning of life... Everybody knows there IS no meaning to life... Humans are a collection of low IQ's trying to convince themselves how great they are DOMINIK 

  ok, so we won't tell you then

Do girls always have to open their mouths when putting on mascara?: Lejo Mario 

  yes, and other times too.  no complaints here

So evidently you guys are "slacking" today too. Max Burgess

  as a matter of fact, three times this week!

I get 21 premium digital cable chanels. Why is it that on any given evening I can sit down and watch porno and not see any beaver?! I can watch HBO...plenty of flacid penis...no beaver. Skinamax...lots of moaning groaning and cheesy plots..no beaver...boobies galore....and i like boobies...but I want to see the bald taco damn it. Im not saying we need the hardcore spreads with her legs at her chest like a fresh tyson chicken sealed in plastic....but a little bush, a little beaver, some cooze, clam, taco, meat sleve, salami sling, wang hanger, some plain old fasioned puss would be nice. Thats all I have to say. -the all knowing god of Hazlett- 

  try the nature channel, plenty of beaver

i learned in scence today that plants have sex- meghan

  yes, but don't brag to your friends about it

The significance of the picture is most of the people in Africa are shit out of luck when it comes to electricity  D. Silverstone

  not quite...

Every now and then i get a sudden urge to go get a big sword an go a-viking!       -Kaos 

  good thing you aren't getting a big tunnel, cause that would be kind of sexual

wazup.this sight rules.i was looking for something evil when i found this.i almost pissed my pants in school-wet pants

  another good reason not to go to school

lalala im so so so bord and im just chillen here ne ways ummmm yea i love your site its reallly cool and the way you take peoples words and twist them around is really cool too. also i can't believe how many people can't spell right i mean you dont always have to have everything perfect but damn at least you could spell things right you know? im out -your biggest fan.... ha ha you don't know who i am!!!!!!! 

  we're a good place to come when you're bord

trapped in a listening lab, strung out on uncle tupelo, glaringly boozy, furious at inabilty to break flashing overpopulated nation code, wondering if i'm a small goodass, seeking fire for another nail in the coffin that is a liberal arts education.... grant maledy 

  it didn't make sense until you got to the "liberal arts education" part...

.-- .... .- -   .-- --- ..- .-.. -..   ..   -... .   -.. --- -. .- - .. -. --.   - --- ..--..   . -.-. ..--..   .-. .. -.-. ....   .--- .- -. -.. -  

  ..- ... 

I'm a nymphomaniac and I'm not afraid to say it -Aisha

  talk is cheap, prove it

All the yellow text makes me think of bananas.  But bananas aren't evil.  Or are they? 

  they are when they're red too

Your site is just short of clever. Keep up the primary color thrill-a-thon. P.S. Did you ever see SP live? (They sucked! Most "fans" never saw them live) 

  short, until you pet us, then things change

so many cats, so little recipes. why r there not enough recipes? its not genuinly clever but screw that, its got cats. hate bloody cats. luv cherry 

  take the chicken ones, substitute cat

-. --- / .. / .-- --- ..- .-.. -.. / -. . ...- . .-. / -.. --- -. .- - . / - --- / - .... . / -.-. .- ..- ... . 

  ..-. ..- -.-. -.-      -.-- --- ..-     - .... . -. 

STICKS AND STONES MAY BREAK MY BONES BUT WIPES AND CHAINS EXITE ME!-blueyedgrlkat@hotmail.com (please e-mail me!!!!) 

  not for us to judge

My pants. My pants!! MY PANTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

  nope, ours

this site is like a never-ending box of chocolates... except you only get one a day and theres no creamy nougat... -katie harral 

  keep looking, we're adding nougat any day now

If you're floating down the street in a chicken wire canoe, and all of your tires go flat, how many waffles can you fit in an elephant's ear?  Answer: It doesn't matter 'cause there's no bones in ice-cream.---------Sally May (SalSal6911@hotmail.com) 

  thank GOD you left your e-mail address

Late one night, Winston Churchill was hosting a party sometime in the mid-1930s, and a woman approached him after he made a lewd joke. The woman said, "Lord Churchill, I do believe you are quite drunk." Winston Churchill simply replied, "Yes, and you madame are quite ugly, but in the morning I shall be sober." - I found evil.com by simply typing in evil.com in the Address bar on Internet Explorer. I soon found that this simplistic and rather confusingly laid out website was the damn best thing I had ever run across. Excellent work... - Matthew "Zero" Johnsen 

  ok, spin us around one more time before you tell us you love us

 Snake Plissken is full of salty goodness. He should be introduced to Anna Malle. They will conceive a child and he shall be called "Rocky Balboa", in accordance with the prophecy. - Rambo Rules, Dave.

  ok

There are spiders nesting in my bed.  They are my pets.  They like to cuddle. --Imalegna Jones 

  you're a cheap date IJ

Hi! I like so love your whole evil website!   PREPPY RULES 

  what exactly are the preppy rules?  kind of like "pastels only" and "tie your sweater around your neck?"

ILAFI LOLAFOVE YOLAFOUR WELAFB SILAFITE! AND do you show any photos of EVIL people? Axel from 99x 

  nope, oh, wait... nope

is it wrong that when your dissecting a squid you start to play with it, blackout and then wakeup the next morning with a killer headache and a army of undead roadkill at your command oh yeah and zack it was it's brainz i cut open-keith h-p 

  we were with you right up to "dissecting"

The fucking Witness Protection Program put Vittorio on my mailbox - Jane Doe 

  get her you mugs

Before I found evil.com, I had written, playfully, pusspuss.com and got a search engine with lots of links to cat pages. Then I went away from the sex thing and found a site with an X files lunch box. It had Doggett on it; not interested. Only want Mulder and Scully. Anyway, again, got to the address bar and briefly thought about yes, hhmm, something that might work. Not porn or anything…I wasn’t really thinking or looking for anything in particuler…so I just wrote evil.com and I found this site. And the weird thing is, it echo’s and seems to be aware of it’s position in the world of cause and effect, dark, twisted people’s minds and moreover, the odd rambler who happens to come across it and be mildly amused and delighted by it’s contents.  Jess Fox UK

  oh

Rich Campagna  Not quite the site that I thought it would be, but it was interesting enough to waste ten minutes. 

  yeah, and we waste ten minutes a day!

This is too spooky...I've been an x files fan since the begining and having just read through your archives, I found your comment about the x files a Tea Leoni very funny and although I hadn't quite thought of the demise of the show like that myself, my mother and I have always hissed at Tea's mention or image...it should have ended 2 years ago, the ending wasn't as good as it should have been...and my email address is pusher_42@hotmail.com...Jess Fox 

  Tea asked us to stop pointing it out.  but it's ok if you do

Do you lot know Moby? Because some of your flippent remarks are like his...well...if you don't know him then he must have visited this site....Jess Fox 

  do we know Moby? dog we going to the south side, honey come back!

Release the Potential! - Jonathan Halfaker 

  ok... uh... whoops! now where did it go?

The bible says all evil will be destroyed in the lake of fire, do you think your website will be included?  The Second Witness 

  we're planning for drunken brawl or sexual exhaustion. lake of fire didn't sound as much fun

Is it healthy to play with yourself 12 times a day? - Javi T. 

  its better than teasing yourself 12 times a day

 This site is werid!!! I love it you sure know how to make people think--*Felisha Fulton* 

  if only we could make people think about their spelling

Haha!!! Evil.com made a typo!!! "rock on miranda.  is stormz your maden name?" Suck on that you perfectionist obsessive compulsive dildo-heads! - Matthew Johnsen 

  uh, like yeah.  like dude, your missing the point

Hey, I stumbled on this site a long time ago, and the front page was just a flower that linked me to nothing. What was up with that? -Phil S. 

  keep looking for the flower phil, you never know, it might show up again...

 - Select this text - Type something - Add your name - Press Submit -as i sit here and close my eyes and decide what to say i realize i am empty and that is the real problem with my life so to fill the hole once again i will turn to the needle the only reality that is left to me. MARSHALL D> 

  whew, for a second there we thought you were going to do that bad poem about sitting on the john

Its all about front butts and camel toes, crack rock and looking through the blinds at police in the trees. - Aleph Mahakala 

  you forgot whippets

Wow this site is both incredibly stupid and funny as hell at the same time. 

  and it can juggle too

.. / .-- --- ..- .-.. -.. / -... . / .... .- .--. .--. -.-- / - --- / -.. --- -. .- - .  / -- --- -. . -.-- .-.-.-  / .. ..-. / --- -. .-.. -.-- / .. / .... .- -.. / ... --- -- . / -- --- -. . -.-- .-.-.- .-.-.- .-.-.-     Agent X 

  .... . .-. . .----. ...      .-      --.- ..- .- .-. - . .-. --..--      --. ---      --. . -      .-      .--- --- -... 

 - Select this hammer - Hit something - Add your name - Kill them all - 

  ok, we chuckled

i want to know the meing of life.... can i find it here? 

  the meing of life is to stir, not shake

IT IS I! PUNNY MORTALS, I WILL SMOTE ALL OF YOU AND SMEAR YOUR BLOOD AGAINST THE NEAREST CROSS! WHERE IS YOU GOD NOW!! LUCIFER HAS SPOKEN, FEAR ME AND FACE MY WRATH!!! 

  ladies and gentlemen, Donald Rumsfield

There are three kinds of people in the world... people who make things happen, people who watch things happen, and people who say, "What the hell just happened?" ~Tiffany Nicolettea 

  huh?

Here in Germany, they sell white cream liqueur in these little plastic vials shaped like sperm.  You can usually buy a bag full of these sperms full of creamy goodness.  When the people have sucked out the creamy goodness, they usually give the sperm to the kids to play with.  It is, then, perhaps needless to say, the shock one receives upon seeing a three year old pull a giant plastic sperm out of their drooling little mouths.  ew. -Imalegna Jones 

  you had us at liqueur

Its not wether you get it or don't get it...........its wether you get it.....ohh wait, I thought we were talking about sex..."psychotantric" 

  actually, it's whether

Where did you get knowledge of Morse Code, citizen? Only Commie Mutant Traitors know of Morse Code. Turets armed. -Friend Computer 

  we learned it from a sailor in Singapore, she was really accommodating

-.-- . ... /  .. /  .-- --- ..- .-.. -.. /  -.. --- -. .- - .   -Fnord 

  - .... .- -. -.- ... 

have you been naughty or nice this year? -santa

  do we get more points for both?

the worst dream ever would be going out quietly in my bed..... aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh -sik since lis humor 

  and the bed is on caster wheels then?

i read your web site    now i want to give a shout:   haiku this you bitch  -goldie garden 

  very nice

"Nothing is always something but something isn't always nothing. "  -Casey Reese 

  you've got to pick a story and stick with it Casey

I thought evil.com was gonna be about some stupid ass wanna-be magik people, but it turned out to be pretty sick, thanks guys - Jack Johnson (PS - I can type, unlike some morons I've seen posting!) 

  abracadabra... nope, still nothing

must...find...solution..to...ape...problem! did you know the female apes are actuallly eating the male apes balls?! must...create...artificial...balls! ~treadmill looser; "it's just one of those days where you fall off a treadmill." no joke *nods* 

  if you eat the ball then nobody scores for the rest of the game

i'm so hot i'm being sued for global warming- didi, Udi 

  maybe that's just methane

Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Update the shouts! Please? 

  no

GAH! When will that conspiracy theory thingy be up! I want to know the......."conspiracy" ~*~Amanda E.~*~ 

  soon, the Bavarian Illuminati are constantly paying aliens to screw up our plans

If pelicans and seagulls somehow got into a fight to the death, who would win?~*~Amanda E.~*~ 

  seaguls. pelicans waddle around like Rush Limbaugh

I love you man... wanna make out? ~Tiffany 

  didn't we already?

Nice to see that you guys let Pootie Tang write the page for the last couple of days... Max Burgess 

  huh?

Massive congrats on what is perhaps the ugliest website in creation. It's so bad it's almost avant garde. Were you too blind with rage to see what you were doing? Love from Bobby Nuthin.xxx  

  pick something. be the best. our philosophy

UPDATEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

  noooooooooooooooo

This site makes me spiteful and mistrustful.  Why can't I stop coming back?  I hate you!  -- Billie Crow

  bwa ha ha!

 Forget allison and nicole you want me-Jeni McCain 

  want you to... paint our house!

cool, nuff said   -Rob 

  good, cause we thought you were going to rattle on about it forever like some fawning simpleton trying to butter us up enough to post his lame ass little posting and we'd never fall for such a blatant manipulative... oh shit.

ashley says that you need to stop beinggg a fooker.. yo 

  we stopped Tuesday, but sure enough we were back at it on Friday

y'know, if you play certain records backwards they make more sense than they do forward- for instance i once got a recipie for an onion stuffing form a korn cd when it got broken in my totally remedial hi-fi. Now there's somthing full of salty goodess...mmm...stuffing......... 

  records?

does it take just one loner person to run this site or do u have a club or sothing? cuz if theres just 1 of u then u must be fuclin' broke or shit! 

  we have a club, a maul, a spiked ball, a mourning star, a flail, and a hammer, so don't mess with us

i have to do my math homework. but im on ur site instead.  now im gunna sue u for making u site to damn addictive. jk.  theres not a use for math neways-heather laross 

  bring it on heather

Chinese overpopulation resolution: Strap babies to bombs, and then raid Japan. The babies are happy because they can fly, and the Chinese are happy because the babies who are going to die ANYWAY serve a purpose, now. Pearl Harbor veterans are also happy. 

  see folks, social commentary and physics in one drooling rant

something tells me I have found my new home page. 

  well, if you must

I say Ashely and Nicole are both shit. they don't stop writing shit about each other.  Chazz Alkota (AKA somebody else) 

  actually, they stopped

the cockroach is the pinnacle of evolution.  when all else is dead, the cockroach remains.  when humanity has eradicated its self and its environment with nuclear winter, the cockroach will remain.  the cockroach is therefore our superior and should be treated with respect.  -- by Haruko

  and... good with garlic butter

.. .-- --- ..- .-.. -.. -.. --- -. .- - . .- - .-.. . .- ... - ..-. .. ...- . -... ..- -.-. -.- ... .. ..-. .. -.-. --- ..- .-.. -..  I know that I am not supposed to use the code but they are after me and I had no other choice than to be sloppy. Parker  "the yellow dart" Carroll 

  -.-- --- ..-      -.-. .- -.      -. --- .-- 

Well what happen to the DDoll and Rediskull link.  I miss those guys from the depths of my heart when will we see them again? 

  they were just saying the same thing about you.  you've got their number, give up this whole pride shit and call.  it's tearing us all apart!

Speaking of, "Insane or just stupid"... Your home page, "www.evil.com" has a link on it that directs you to... "www.evil.com." 

  it's in case you get lost

procrastination is masturbation; it feels good at first, but then you realize you are just fucking yourself -Beau Carrillo 

  we like ourselves.  no, no, we love ourselves.  and we'll love ourselves in the morning

From a native plants perspective Johnmy Appleseed was a fucking biological terrorist- Beau Carrillo 

  plants wouldn't swear

Check back daily you say. Have you any idea how quickly this gets boring? If I wasn't a phone drone for the world's largest and most evil ISP with plenty of company time to waste I wouldn't waste my time. True, it is grimly fascinating to find a site devoid both of style and content. Bobby Nuthin  

  so don't

They say "Seeing is deceiving" But I just think we're just ignoring what we're seeing or we're closing our eyes to not see the dead truth. -D.L.-  

  can we open our eyes now?

"There is no fate that cannot be surmounted by scorn" - A. Camus 

  Hah!

So you insult people on a website and you think your so cool when your probably a zit faced 18 year old who still jacks off everytime he sees a girl-some  who knows you 

  that would be interesting, we were just thinking the same thing about you

You know what?Llamas are VERY cool....and I like eggs and purple turles(VERY random)-Kodi 

  lamas are not cool, they're covered with all that fur stuff and they spit

You're website sucks.  You are obviously a life form made of entirely asshole. 

  why does "sucks" have such a negative connotation? 

 This site is the funniest fuckin thing i have ever seen, whoever made this site is my new idol. I LOVE IT!!!, evil stuff makes me happy.heh.      Drew Padgett 

  didn't you hear that we're made of asshole?  do you still love us?

"hey yhow peeps, how can i make an email in this site huh?! i've sign-in already but i don t know were is your mailing address  now......... i've tried all my fucking way to find it but what a dumb self i cant find it..!!!!! 

  good, cause it doesn't exist

You guys are late, dammit!! I need my medicine! I need evil.com! AAAAARGHHLE! * cough, cough * - Bob Gorski 

  that's why god made espn.  they're our back up in case we forget to update

Okay, so Catholics believe in the ressurection of Christ right?  And he 'supposedly' roamed the earth for 40 days and nights afterward continuing to spread his message.  That means that for a little over a month, JESUS WAS A FREAKING ZOMBIE!  How can people put their faith in a Zombie God? If  you go to Hell, you're gonna get burned, but if you go to Heaven, you get yoru brains eaten? Why be nice to people if you're going to get your brain eaten anyway? -- Tim Evans  68.96.195.214

  right. ok. wow. twisted? sounds right. ok.

-.-- --- ..- .- .-. . .- .-.. .-. . .- -.. -.-- - .-- --- -.. .- -.-- ... .-.. .- - . .. ..-. -.-- --- ..- -. . . -.. .... . .-.. .--. .--- ..- ... - .- ... -.- /  .-. .. -.-. .... .--- .- -. -.. - 

  - .... .- -. -.- ... 

I disagree. Drinking yourself to sleep at night is a fine way to live...through the next 18 months, possibly 72. Max Burgess 

  we're currently on 51. do we get a prize for 73?

OK!!!! The last fucking time I was in here, I submitted a fucking message, and it's been awhile since I came here, and I tried looking for it, and I couldn't fucking find it!!!! I hope I see this damn thing in here for hell hath no fury!!!! And believe me.....IT doesn't. Oh, and fuck ashley and nicole. They're hella stupid.- Me being incredibly bored 

  us, bored too

I am mental and going to die becuz i eat too many popcicles, this site made my last few minutes a little more interesting. -Kelly Ore 

  a moment of silence for Kelly

Great jobs guys! Your doing a sub-standard jod as usual! Keep up the good fight! Whitesaber2001@yahoo.co.uk 

  we win!

Have you noticed that the justice system is basicly just a way for criminals to try to get out of having to pay for their crimes, and that lawyers are just people taking advantage of the fact that such a system even exists?  It's like the Martha Stewart trial.  Everyone knew she was guilty, but if she could lie well to the jury she would go free. 

  we got confused when you used criminals and lawyers in the same paragraph.  trouble keeping them straight

I think I've realized the secret behind how you chose whether to make something a shout or a drool.  Basicly, everything sent at first became a shout and everything that spilled onto other pages is a drool.  It's completely imposible to be a shout!  If it is, make this a shout, then I'll believe you.  (By the way, your system is very evil.) 

  yeah, we're going to have to fix that some day... or maybe not

sex is only fun if its with someone you dont love. my boyfriend said "i love you babe" then he said "yack" i dont know what yack means, but it confuses me- i enjoy being confused. my brother broke my middle finger so now i can write fuck you on my cast and flip people off- (always) ~KELLY~ 

  have fun

fuck ashley and nichole, im with you now (always) ~KELLY~ p.s. dont be afraid cuz their going to be after you either way 

  still having fun

slap me im french, kiss me im irish, spank me im american (seriously), fuck me im british, smoke with me im jamacian- (your one and only) ~KELLY~ 

  fun fun fun

This site has very little point.  My life has very little point.  A bowling ball has very little point.  A kitten generally has 20 very little points. I'm generally interested in things with a pair of points.  Pears don't generally have points. I don't like pears anyway.  Tarmaque the Magnificent. 

  and your point is?

I just dont get it man, I mean I dont know why i just wrote this, truth be told I cant even read. I just write using a stream of semi-selfconciousness I learned from a drunk buhhidist._Ronan Haughey

  we know that guy

Everything is relative. By normal society's standards, I am weird. Compared to most of the insane shouts, I am normal. John Smith MCXLVIII 

  is MCXLVII a greek name?

 - This sight sucks, you could at least talk about something-Someone  

   

OK

El Juego del Año del 2001 recrea la ciudad francesa de Carcassonne y sus alrededores, famosa por su inigualable fortaleza medieval, que rodea toda la parte antigua de la villa. En este juego, los jugadores deben colocar estratégicamente sus piezas de terreno y sus obreros para tratar de controlar las zonas y construcciones de la región: sus castillos, caminos, monasterios y campos. Es un sencillo pero a la vez completo juego de estrategia de 2 a 5 jugadores, apto para jugar a partir de los 8 años. La duración de la partida suele ser de 30 a 45 minutos, lo cual lo convierte en un juego ágil y rápido de jugar.

 

I came to evil dot com looking for explicit instructions but all I get is encouragement.  --J. Brennan 

  keep trying, you're doing great

There are two muffins in an oven. One of them say, "Man, its hot in here." The other muffin looks at it and screams, "Oh my GOD! Its a talking muffin!"  -Natalie DeKeyzer 

  frankly, we'd be freaked out too

If a tree falls on Mars in the middle of the winter of our discontent before a bird croaks with no one around to determine the exact air speed velocity of an unladen swallow, can a duck float while a witch is on top of it after a large meal containing those that would mock her on a saturday after they have mowed their lawn in the rain after a lunar eclipse seen from the Oort Cloud in a dodecahedrally-shaped ship piloted by a drunken Turk?---I have many names.  Which would you like?--- 

  we want the third one

Hey... you're not a squirrel, are you? You are! Don't deny it. You and I both know you and your squirrel minions are going to take over the world. You've already mind-controlled the canadians. Don't look at me like that. I'm not crazy. *twitch twitch*  - an anonymous squirrel worshiper 

  eep!

YES...THE EVIL DAMN FOSSIL WATCH IS STARING AT ME...IT KNOWS I HAVE TO LOOK AT IT...IT SHALL DIE UPON THIS NIGHT!!!-DarcSpyd3r 

  why do you think they call it Fossil?

Dude none of my stupid thingys ever get posted.... i feel so hated... HOLD ON A SECOND i never tried to post ne thing here have I? oops i thought i was at porn.com  -pooheadwatermonkey

  can we stop holding now?

How come stealing from a book is plagiarism, but stealing from many is research? -Darcy- 

  and stealing a book is stealing

This goes out to that stupid girl that keeps beggin stephen for a picture.... heres an idea! why dont you ask stephen instead of bothering ppl who have to fucking idea who the hell stephen is!?!?! you stupid moron i hope a psychotic mouse bites your toe off wihle your eating carrots.....    -KaR- 

  what he said

This site beats my monkey! It has no apparent purpose, but it's so damn funny! Crazy shit seems so appealing when you're high... or drunk. I'm one of those... but I forget which category I fall under. -Chelle Lapi- 

  we're sorry about the monkey.  do they bruise?

It's so nice to visit a site that makes more sense than www.timecube.com. Although I am beginning to wonder if your site is the educator of the masses. - The Probe 

  we like to think of ourselves as the probe of the masses

such an enlongated time keeping watch on this site AND ALL I HAVE TO SAY IS......... wut wuz i talking bout-sik since lis humor 

  looks like the drugs kicked in about the time your caps lock key got stuck

Your site is nice, but you should probably start giving out candy. Or have a bingo night. Or one of those guessing games where you have to guess how many jellybeans are in the jar, and if you get it right, you win the jellybeans. -Katie Harral 

  have a jelly bean. yeah, they're all brown

Could mentally deficent people be used as military spies/assasins? Who would suspect? If you could train them that is. Just a thought.  Davin Willstarr 

  hell, they can fit just about any post in the military, and do

My history of contemporary music class recently assigned a songwriting assignment.  Mine was about evil.com.  You guys rock! ~ Consentual Sects 

  damn, now that's gonna be stuck in our heads all day

The red font / black background is scary, or should I say...evil. muahahaha  - Cheryl Bejar 

  and the yellow? you didn't mention the yellow

What the fuck is wrong with German people? -IJ 

  we'll take them over the French, or Texans

Evil.com is about as evil as a sausage with no beans and a hella lot of ketchup... - Tokes 

  ketchup qualifies as a vegetable in California schools

IMHO ppl who use 2 mny shorthand thngs when psting shld be strung up by their naughty bits w/piano wire.  ROFLMAO You are all uneducated inbred losers whose incestuous parents coupled briefly underneath the bleachers at a football game.  -Evil Twin Douglas 

  and you were watching, so what does that say about you pervert

Who exactly are "the boys of summer"???  -Samara 

  we forgot to ask them

I know the answer (occurs once in a minute, twice in a moment, but never in a hundred thousand years) It's the letter "m" !!!  -Agent X 

  what Stephen King novel uses that?

I bet the writers of evil.com are really some high placed executives at a software company somewhere. Thats my theory. One other question what you guys got against Canadians? Did you know that when Playboy Magazine puts a Canadian girl on the cover, their sales go up over 40% for that month. - Rick Mercer 

  define "highly placed"

This is a very intresing site although the point of it is somewhat unclear? , AJP 

  it's working!

How did Jerry Cornelius go from a really cool needle pistol to a boring vibrogun? Something is aesthetically wrong here. -KwisatZ- 

  you don't have to reload a vibrogun, and it's good on dates

man u never fucking put my entries u hoebag. why dont u just shave ur pubic hair to get rid of ur pubic lice and let ur mom lick it, u cock sucking dipshit.......as for the site however, good job. as for you..yeah..fuck you - monkey morton 

  talk like that will keep you out of the pag... urm... damn it, again!

.- -. ... .-- . .-. - .... .. ... ---... .-- .... .- - -- ..- ... - .. -.. --- - --- --. . -  -- -.-- ..-. .-. .. --. --. .. -. .-. .- -. - ... .--. --- ... - . -.. --- -. -.-- --- ..- .-. .-..-. . ...- .. .-.. .-..-. ... .. - . ..--.. .- -. -.. -. --- .-- .. .----. -- .- .-.. .-.. --- ..- - --- ..-. .-. .- -. - ... -....- -... . . - .-. --- --- - -... --- -.--   

  -.- . . .--.      - .-. -.-- .. -. --.

The map...it has something to do with countries that have food shortages or famine right?  Oh, well.  I rule!  -Billie Crow 

  indeed, partially correct, good guess - now compare and contrast

And then the monkeys came flying through my window and said that the plot to rid the world of all cars had failed and then I said that no, it hadn't and that they were just being stupid like stupid monkeys are supposed to be and that it was okay and then they flew out my window and ran into a cloud but kept going......*drools*....... Uh is that all I have to say? Yes. Wait! No it's not! I forgot to tell you that my favorite stupid monkey died after falling off a green llama and I was sad for 30 entire seconds and then I realized that now he was like me! Okay, I'm done. Are you sure? Yes, I'm sure! Why wouldn't I be, I mean, wait... yeah, I'm sure. Okay, bye.  Squirrel 

  OK, now we really want to see if monkeys bruise

uhm...i love your site, i am showing it to my friend right now...he couldnt stop laughing his ass off!! but he does want to know what the map thing means. come to think of it...so do i......hhhmmmmmmmmmm........~~~~~porcelainhaze~~~~~ 

  when it comes off, who picks it up to reattach it?  that's friendship!

I have to say that my visit to this site was an accident, but all the same not a bad one at all, the reading are interseting, (like the sexy nerd I am) but all the same it is very flavorable...  Not as good as my lips.. Keep up this fine work, I love you site for the fact to made it different... A new fan Tiger Lynn 

  is Tiger Lynn your porn name?  we think everyone needs a porn name, just in case

 Sneaks around....sneaks away...sneaks back....god im Sneaky.......... 

  heh, we saw you all the time

Awesome Sight...confusing...but awesome...1 question...do you have to play with yourself to understand the sight?- Little Rogue 

  it helps

Cherry eyeliner and I are not from Jersey, or origin is located in Costa Rica. Oddly enough Cherry eyeliner said that Cherry eyeliner tastes like blueberry. I would like to take this moment to say I love 311 and you -Nalani Jolly 

  the fact that you know what Cherry Eyeliner tastes like is oddly arousing...

 keep any person calling themselves 'Patty' away from this site - Kat East 

  ok

Why do your big toes only have two knuckles? All your other digits have three, even your thumbs. So why only two for your big toes? -Morgan 

  ran out

Hey!! da front page has next month's date on it!!.......(kidding) .......hehehe 

  ohhhhh!  you made us look too!

Ok so your evil.com whitch makes you evil and since Dr.Evil is evil then Evil.com is infact Dr.Evil and since Dr.Evil is infact playd by Mike Myers then Dr. Evil is Mike Myers and since Evil.com is Dr.Evil then evil.com has to be Mike Myers-chorbalan 

  no, Dr. Evil is a character played by Michael Meyers.  we are much more attractive than MM, although he has more money

James Antonino...You're going to "hate" this really meaning you're gonna love it...I typed a bunch of text about how a wise man said that if you nail hot girls then that's great, but if youre doing the not so hot girls too, you doing more girls because not only are you scoring with the ugly ones but you'll hook up with thier hot friends the following weekend ...I mentioned that hot girls befriend ugly ones because ugly girls(unless me or other wise men are in the room) will not get laid, giving the hot girl an almost guaranteed "out" if she needs one. Now, strategically speaking, would it not make more sense to take one for your own team by making the fat, ugly, unused, and unwanted slore feel great about herself for one night? Thus, having a very warm introduction to her blazing friend the following weekend after she's heard nothing but wonderful things about you all week long...I've put too much time into the whole breaking down of this topic and by the sounds of what i have typed you're thinking, " 

  yeah, and we deleted the first part too.  shame about that

 - hehe ppl should go to hell who say this site isnt fun. . .confusing but fun-hehe Maria Francis 

  is hell more or less fun.  confused > us

i love you site it is the best and I have been sent to tell you to finish conspiricy theory 101 from ur loving PTA POST TRASH ANALYZERS - can i have some salty goodness-keith h-p 

  the salty goodness is over there.  help yourself

Hey I was wondering, why on the archive page, dor some of the months the dates go in descending order, and on others they go in asending order? Is it like another one of your twisted little items to confuse the stupid or were you just to lazy to put them in the right order? Email me with a response at pizza_49@hotmail.com Thanks,......oh and just so I get on the drooling page AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, BALH, HEE HEE, I want pie, I really do, HEE HEEE HEE HEEE HEE HEEE. 

  because we're just too damn lazy to be consistent

My bananas are developing smallpox and it is all due to you... and the tyrannical Russian Soviet regime that runs guns to Nicaragua.  Stop supporting the facists! 

  ok, we'll stop

So you get to know what my lifes story is, it all started when i was a little girl i was playing with my favourite EVIL.COM when a chicken came and said would you like fries with that i kissed the chicken(we go deeper with the chickens every time dont we) and i turned into a dashing peice of salami named EVIL.COM to be continued-chorbalan 

  no, please, that was more than enough

Girls have it.  Guys want it.  And yet so few of them are willing to trade... yes, sexual relationships CAN be explained by twisted laws of economics... -SC 

  we thought it was their phone number

This site reeks pure awesomeness...and makes no sense at the same time. Thats just too cool. You might just be crazy or a genius but..you get the point...I think...-Little Rogue 

  we often say "we must be crazy" and rarely say "we must be geniuses" so make of that what you will

Eirik here, just thought I would stop by and ask some questions you will for all certainty make fun off. Now; It isn't very wise to answer every god damn idiot comment that is on this face of the planet (left), still it IS fun to make fun of them and all, but we've seen that (notice how I cleverish use third person form ((notice alse how I use noun as adjectives))), my advice is to make the "american", as we smart people like to call it, PERISH IN FLAMES! *ahem* Quite. Now 1. 2. 3 make fun of me! ( doing that would just make you more predictable, so do something original today) -Eirik 

  heh, we delete an enormous number of them.  in fact, that's what takes most of the time between updates

you guys should talk about dirty sox....  love ur lil sex kitten   -"i am so baked" 

  dirty sox?  they're all over the floor.  are you offering to do our laundry?  yea!

"To those who here me, there are things that i know that i shouldnt, things that would horify you more than anything else in the world, things that enable me to destroy all life on earth, if you want to know who i am i will tell you.  I am Insis 

  uh, did Donald Rumsfeld get a computer?

 -Emily asks, "How would you define the term imaginary pornstar? Emily Wrichs 

  slut?  just guessing there

ok no jumpin to conclusions but hey... i can't remember ur email n i know u run this site ... just gotta say i love you and i miss you--- 

  if you knew our e-mail, you couldn't forget it, poser

Thanks for continuing to brighten up my day. And here, you might enjoy this: http://virtualeclipse.ca/sushi/doginhat . - Psi Sushi (again) 

  is it bright enough now?  we want to rest

Trust me Zoe is definitly not the biggest slut in the U.K. I know her. Her Name is Layla. i would Give you the phone number but you guys don't want the infamous Herpes Mono Syphalis Combo know would ya??? 

  so again, this is useless info

If greatness was next to masculinity then this site would have balls like water melons - Ben Jones UK 

  you peeked

I have exhausted every other internet amusement, and so here I am writing in feedback to evil.  Frederik von Nunnsenstein 

  did you try playing with the yahoo maps?  t

Yesterday, I went sailing.  As a result, I got a really bad sunburn, my boat leaked, and the car battery ran down.  We had cables, but when we tried to open the hood, the cable snapped.  We called a tow truck - and the guy took about an hour to arrive.  In the meanwhile, the rearview mirror broke off when we tried to adjust it.  We had to tow the van because the guy was incompetent, and leave the boat in Oakland (after it had been left 3 months in Richmond).  I'm not looking for sympathy, It's just that I thought the entire thing was funny. 

  we're laughing

Can you please put this feedback up quickly because I need to remind my mom that Quincy called.  Thanks.  If you can have it up by tomorrow that would be good because she needs to know then.  (Today is Monday) 

  Monday?  hey, that's in two days!  boy, we're fast!

i sometimes wonder why no one else really likes the book of magical splendour as much as tina and i do. perhaps it is all the disgusting pictures. maybe we shouldn't draw such things. but too many people already take things far too seriously. - gc (http://gracyelala.tripod.com) 

  and again, we have to say... huh?

how do u get messages posted...oh...J M 

  keep trying

"Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline......" If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you. If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call. If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, telephone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name.If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you are blonde don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up. -from jenni youknowwho. maybe you don't. tough. 

  we pressed the FLASH key.  what does that mean?

Bobo the chimp loves you. Yes. I'm stupid. I'm babbling. Bu-But I love you! And so does Bobo! -Natalie DeKeyzer (Oh no! I put my real name!) 

  oh no! it doesn't really matter!

This one was put in a jacket, This one was sent home,This one was given bread and meatBut would eat none,And this one cried No No No NoAll day long. This one looked at the windowas though it were a wall,This one saw things that were not there, This one things that were,And this one cried No No No NoAll day long. This one thought himself a bird,This one a dog,And this one thought himself a man,An ordinary man,And cried and cried No No No NoAll day long. -SouLessOne- 

  hey, we can see the end of the list from here!  wow!

if evil.com is fulll of salty goodness then is good.com full of salty evilness? Matt 

  we doubt it.  they're probably full of shit.  wait a sec, checking... yep, Palm Pilots - we were right.

why do people say everything tastes like chicken? Is this some new chicken I haven't been allowed to try yet? by the way "you can't fight in here! this is the war room!" from Jenni M (please post me, I love you! if i spell something wrong, will you post me? ok then...blargh) 

 
people generally have no imagination.  next time someone offers you cobra, take a bite, chew thoughtfully, then ask for another small bite, chew that one and breathe in a bit. then say "it tastes just like raccoon."  you'll be amazed at how many people will start to trust your judgement and sing your praises
 

I keep readingthe shouts andthey all seem familiar(sp.?)  and I cant rember if I read thisone or not-confused-

  big secret, we recycle

When it is our turn to get the pie? By the way on my birthday can you put another raul and evil.com eposode in it?- Sinbad Johnson 

  ok, on your birthday, which we'll psychically know of course

 

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